If you move one more time...
Drew and I have been married just over 2 months now. I will tell you one of the hardest things I am learning about is how to fall asleep and stay asleep with another body in the bed. I went from a twin sized bed to a queen. I was thinking there has to be so much room in this thing I won't even know he is there. Boy was I wrong. Let me point out to you the few key problems I have.
1. Snoring
I thought for sure snoring would not be as bad because (no offense Dad) I could literally here my dad snoring in his bedroom with his door shut with me sleeping in my bedroom (which was next door) with my door shut. Now Drew is not that bad. Surprisingly. He does these snores that scare the shit out of me and I think a gun has gone off. Anyway at least he is not a constant snorer. It does make me wonder if he knows I just woke up and decides to snore so I can spend the next hour debating on if I should suffocate him or not. For the most part I just hit him and he stops. You know what I mean.
2. Instant Falling asleep
There is one thing of my husbands that I want. I want his ability to fall asleep instantly. Like, mid conversation, the second his head hits the pillow, the instant he says he is tired and the moment we start a movie (after he has said "I'm not tired". If I had the ability to fall asleep that fast I may actually get a full nights sleep. I have such a hard time falling asleep. First you have to get comfortable, then you have to make sure the temperature is right, if you are hot before you fall asleep, there is no way you are going to make it through the night without being so hot you have to take all the covers off. I don't know if all men are like that, but I know I want to be like that.
3. Moving
The other problem about sleeping with another body in the bed is that when you move they move (unfortunately he still sleeps when I move), when they move you move (unfortunately it always wakes me up). I hear him get up for water or to pee, but when I get up he never seems to wake up or really move. I can't stand when he rolls over and he literally rolls, he doesn't stay on his side, or anything he actually ends up in the middle of the bed. That is not fair. He is like a giant. I can't roll him back over because most of the time I can't wake him up.
4. The amount of pillows he needs
Let alone my husband is a giant he insists of sleeping with 3 pillows...for himself. Queen bed, 3 regular pillows and a body pillow. BODY pillow, as in like another body, there is not enough room for all that. I finally told him the body pillow next to him at to go, so it now is above our heads, but he sleeps holding a large hard pillow. He holds it on his left side, so when he moves, so does that damn pillow. By morning he has 10 inches of bed on his left side, is smack dab in the middle of the bed and I'm praying that I don't fall off the bed. It has come to the point when the SECOND and I mean second his ass is up for work I am sprawled out on the bed like I own it. I get the best sleep when he leaves for work.
I suppose I am just not accustomed to sleep with another person in the bed which I am sure takes time to adjust to but I better get used to it soon. I want to be able to sleep well all night and not have to sleep in until 9 (or 11...) just to get some really good sleep because I finally have the bed all alone. I actually am thinking when I am done with school that I want to work midnights so we both can sleep better. Really, I don't think he could sleep any better then he does now since he sleeps like rock but I would not mind sleeping better.
I bet as you read this at least 1 thing jumped out at you, please share your experiences so I know that I am still normal.
1. Snoring
I thought for sure snoring would not be as bad because (no offense Dad) I could literally here my dad snoring in his bedroom with his door shut with me sleeping in my bedroom (which was next door) with my door shut. Now Drew is not that bad. Surprisingly. He does these snores that scare the shit out of me and I think a gun has gone off. Anyway at least he is not a constant snorer. It does make me wonder if he knows I just woke up and decides to snore so I can spend the next hour debating on if I should suffocate him or not. For the most part I just hit him and he stops. You know what I mean.
2. Instant Falling asleep
There is one thing of my husbands that I want. I want his ability to fall asleep instantly. Like, mid conversation, the second his head hits the pillow, the instant he says he is tired and the moment we start a movie (after he has said "I'm not tired". If I had the ability to fall asleep that fast I may actually get a full nights sleep. I have such a hard time falling asleep. First you have to get comfortable, then you have to make sure the temperature is right, if you are hot before you fall asleep, there is no way you are going to make it through the night without being so hot you have to take all the covers off. I don't know if all men are like that, but I know I want to be like that.
3. Moving
The other problem about sleeping with another body in the bed is that when you move they move (unfortunately he still sleeps when I move), when they move you move (unfortunately it always wakes me up). I hear him get up for water or to pee, but when I get up he never seems to wake up or really move. I can't stand when he rolls over and he literally rolls, he doesn't stay on his side, or anything he actually ends up in the middle of the bed. That is not fair. He is like a giant. I can't roll him back over because most of the time I can't wake him up.
4. The amount of pillows he needs
Let alone my husband is a giant he insists of sleeping with 3 pillows...for himself. Queen bed, 3 regular pillows and a body pillow. BODY pillow, as in like another body, there is not enough room for all that. I finally told him the body pillow next to him at to go, so it now is above our heads, but he sleeps holding a large hard pillow. He holds it on his left side, so when he moves, so does that damn pillow. By morning he has 10 inches of bed on his left side, is smack dab in the middle of the bed and I'm praying that I don't fall off the bed. It has come to the point when the SECOND and I mean second his ass is up for work I am sprawled out on the bed like I own it. I get the best sleep when he leaves for work.
I suppose I am just not accustomed to sleep with another person in the bed which I am sure takes time to adjust to but I better get used to it soon. I want to be able to sleep well all night and not have to sleep in until 9 (or 11...) just to get some really good sleep because I finally have the bed all alone. I actually am thinking when I am done with school that I want to work midnights so we both can sleep better. Really, I don't think he could sleep any better then he does now since he sleeps like rock but I would not mind sleeping better.
I bet as you read this at least 1 thing jumped out at you, please share your experiences so I know that I am still normal.
posted by Drew and Noelle Newlon | 3:13 PM
3 Comments:
Holy CRAP you have me in stitches I am laughing so friggin hard. You sound EXACTLY like me. Brian has a cute little snore that for some reason somewhere around 2am turns from cute to "I want to kill you"! I can't say much, I grind my teeth and he wants to kill me for that. Brian also INSTANTLY falls asleep! I have no idea how they do that. Many a night since Brian is taller than me and I sleep srunched down with my toes hanging off the end of the bed unfortunatly my face is right in his elbow wacking range. Yeah that's not fun when he (hand his pillow cuddle partner) roll over and WACK me right in the face. Good times. Brian and I both require 2 pillows and we have seperate blankets so no tug of war.
You'll work it out, or just take 2 shots of whiskey before bed and it's night night till morning!
You are not alone in this. This is just the good stuf our mommas never told us ;)
Well... unfortunately I really can't say that I have the same experiences. The commonality I do have is that EVERYTHING wakes me up, but you know very well that I've always been a light sleeper (if I even sleep at all) I've actually found that adding Kenny to my (or his bed) really helped with the insomnia issues that I've always had. Now, I can almost fall asleep at the drop of a hat, but the drop of a pin could wake me up.
So, I've been trying to think of what may be different with our sleeping arrangements to give you suggestions so you can share in the blissful sleep that I have. First of all you need to wean him off of the body pillow, he should be holding you. At first, Kenny and I shared a TWIN bed... very small. So we had no other option than spooning and he was forced to hold me. I feel like this helped form a connection between us, and I really have a hard time sleeping without him or Bailey.
Also, I do not have a problem with snoring partners (occasionally Bailey with snore though). I think putting a stop to the unnecessary mower sleeping next to you is essential for catching quality Z's. Try all those "snore remedies" from the drug store to see if something helps. If not invest in some great ear plugs :)
Now... here some of my inner Recreation Therapist coming out as this is something that I would suggest to my patients. Try some Relaxation Exercises before you go to bed, or anytime in the evening. Do things like deep breathing, yoga, progressive muscle relaxation, guided imagery, etc. I find it wonderful to incorporate aromatherapy and soothing music to these practices.
Now, some things that I most likely would not recommend to my patients... If all else fails, there's also the medicinal/holistic way of doing it. Try something like melatonin, essential oils like lavender to relax or Valerian root, or cannabis. Even a couple of glasses of wine before bed might help you fall asleep. But be careful because alcohol inhibits REM sleep, so you might not feel rested in the morning even if you did not wake up throughout the night.
Good luck and happy sleeping! :)
You're not alone! Andrew kicks and steals blankets... and I wake up over just about anything. Sarah gave some really great suggestions though. And I do have some favorite relaxation teas to help me relax before I go to bed, it makes you fall asleep faster. I of course would send you some, except I don't have a certain someone's address yet... =(
I also agree that the body pillow has to go, if he needs to hold on to something he can hold you. Besides, that pillow just takes up too much space.
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